Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Emo Posting: DON'T DO IT!

Okay, Let's get it all out there in the open. Emo Posting... on Facebook. This is posting posts just for attention purposes. Statuses such as "Oh dear, I think my hair is soooooooooooooooooOooooooooooooooooo ugly" or "*sigh* why does the world have to be so mean?" would fall into this category.

First, before we talk about how to be done with those posts, I should clarify. There are times when you feel emotional, and you are angry, or sad. That is okay. Post those. Sometimes we just need to yell and scream and have the world know how we feel. It's nice to know people listen (or read), for whatever reason. If you post multiple statuses about the same topic within seven days of each other...that is where you need to draw the line. (Of course there are exceptions, but those are a case-to-case kind of ordeal.) For example, say it is finals week and you are extremely stressed (first off, if it's finals week and you're on facebook...well I won't go into that). You get on facebook and decide to post a status update. "Ugh! Finals. Shoot me!" It is the next day of finals and you are even more stressed because your killer math test is coming up. "AH! I hate finals!" Then the third day rolls around. That English essay that's due? Well you forgot...until just barely when someone else posts a status about it. "OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! MY ESSAY!!! I FORGOT TO WRITE IT!!!" Now is a good time to just stop, if you've gone this far to begin with.

Now say your mother is away on vacation and you miss her (and her cooking). It's alright to let the world know you miss her. "Mom, why did you have to go?" End of story. Simple, to the point, and people might offer to cook for you while she's away.

Alright, back to Emo Posting. DON'T DO IT! "*sigh* life is just so hard" The proper response to that should be "yes, it is. so what?" News Flash: LIFE IS ALWAYS GOING TO BE HARD! No matter how much you whine about it. Whining about it only makes it harder for other people too.

Statuses meant to grab male attention, those probably ought to go, ladies. "Oh no,  I got to school and realized my shirt is on backwards, how embarrassing" I honestly don't think guys are really going to think "oh, poor soul, I should date her to make her feel better." While the shirt thing is embarrassing and entertaining for everyone to know, one post is enough. The second you repost it or post an update...that crosses the line.

Along those same lines, date-less posts... What to say, what to say... A date-less post is one that reads something like "I just wish I had a boyfriend," Followed by a few more statuses or quizzes that scream "RUN MEN!!" Having a boyfriend is awesome, don't get me wrong, but publicly stating it again and again on facebook just exudes desperate. And guys don't like desperate girls.

I'm not trying to bash on you, because I'm sure I've done it too. I'm just trying to help you not look so silly. The first step to looking cooler on the largest social network in the world is to stop acting like a pre-adolescent girl. (unless you are one, then please, keep doing what you're doing) Be mature. I know you can do it.

When a problem arises, you should probably not facebook about it. You may be asking me, why? The answer lies within the logic of human beings. You post about a problem that has arisen at school, or home, or involving roommates. Boys are going to be scared off by this. They don't want the whole world to know if they do something wrong. What if he asks you out and it goes wrong? Then it's all over the web in half a second and that poor boy is never going to go out with anyone again. No one is going to want to go out with a boy who "tripped over his own feet and spilled his hot chocolate all over" his date's new dress. If you update the world about every little problem you have, men may be intimidated and think that you're too picky, and that you're too big of a risk.

If you feel the need to post about a problem, maybe you're looking for help, then go ahead. But don't post about every single little problem you come across. Also, posting after you've solved the problem is a sign of a strong woman. Try it.

There are posts that are simply pathetic. They generate responses such as "oh, I know. I'm so sorry. <3" or "hang in there, life will get better." There are times when life gets extremely bumpy, and sometimes it feels good to just let it all out, but you really need to think about why you're posting it. Are you truly discouraged and need some loving words or do you just feel like you need more attention? If it's the first then post until you're heart's content. If it's the second, then step aside here with me, and let's chat.

I've been in your little boat. Attention is a great thing, especially from the opposite gender. Anything to get their attention seems like a good idea. It's not. You don't want the wrong kind of attention. You want the kind of attention that lets them see you as God sees you. You want them to see you as a confident, beautiful, gentle woman who loves those close to her. (or if you prefer to be the opposite...that's cool too) You don't want people thinking "oh gosh, she's a handful." in a bad way. Unfortunately people take things extremely out of context, and they will tear you apart. Make it hard for them to do that. Don't give the whole world puppy dog eyes. Flex your muscles and show them your tough side. (metaphorically speaking of course) It's really hard to tear someone down who "Just memorized all five of her audition pieces two months early!" (You can call her an overachiever, but that's a good thing.)

It's easy to do in theory. "Oh, I can so post awesome posts!" But sometimes it might be hard because you just want attention from the guys on your friends list. Refrain from doing it. A status update every single day isn't necessary. If you need a friend to talk to, call one...or text them. Or go over to their house.

Be you. Be confident in you. Make the world crave you, don't crave the world.

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