Thursday, June 6, 2013

T.V.

I'm at work right now. Bored out of my mind. I decided I would watch me some Hulu. I picked the first show that came up on their little banner. It was America's Got Talent. Let me tell you, America does not have talent...not T.V. talent anyway.

There were some great singers.

An awesome orchestra/choir rocked a classical version of "Call Me Maybe."

A little girl did a great vocal/piano piece.

And then there were the usual terrible talents where girls where nothing and just "be sexy" on stage.

That's not what I'm talking about though. I'm talking about our inability to make decent T.V. The entire episode was one and a half hours. I watched 10-15 minutes of the entire thing. The rest? It was all fluff, pointless banter. Basically, it was time-wasting crap.

That is what America is...reality T.V.

If someone asked me to define America, I would just say "reality T.V."

I'm not saying that Americans are the people featured on reality T.V., but that everything about reality T.V. is America. Everything from the creators, to the "talent" to the audience is America. (yes, obviously, but just listen for a sec.)

What do I mean? I mean that everyone has the "get rich quick" attitude. No work for lots of pay. Who doesn't want that? Reality T.V. is far easier to produce than a feature film. It's cheaper. The crew is far smaller, so less people to pay (and feed). No writer. No fussy actors. I know that there are going to be people out there (some I might even know) who disagree and think reality T.V. is great and difficult to make...but that's just because they never studied astronomy and missed that chance to see that there are endless possibilities in this world. Yeah, I'm calling them morons...in a very loving way. =)

A lazy man decides he wants to make money. So what does he do? He finds an "interesting person" and films them. BAM! Reality T.V. honestly, though, how many of these people are actually that interesting? Do you go to the mall to watch moms dress their daughters up in hooker clothes and parade them around? Do you look at your neighbor with a truck in their yard and a couch on their driveway and think "yes, this man is fascinating!"? Probably not. So why do you want to watch someone get drunk off their rocker, and sleep with a bum who might be their cousin? The thing is, someone is getting paid for it because he thought of filming his mailbox before you did. Deal with it.

Why is that man getting rich? Because Americans don't want to grow. They don't want to progress. I know there are several of us out there that do try to improve ourselves, but the vast majority, I feel, do not... Or if they do, they don't understand how. Watching a redneck go shopping at the supermarket in Okay, O.K. is not going to make you a better person. I honestly have not become a better person because I watched girls skimp down and take pictures to compete for a title. Yes, there are those shows that actually teach you things, but really, are you watching those? No. Why? Because you're alone if you want to actually succeed by your own hard work. No one likes to be alone...so we all sit and watch our favorite tubby toddlers tan just so we can chat about it at the water cooler.

The truth is, T.V. sucks. I know our tastes all vary, but honestly, T.V. is struggling to keep up because people don't want to be bettered, people don't want to work for money, people don't want to be "good people." People have to be better because they won't get a raise if they don't (or maybe they will). People have to actually get off the couch because very few people make money staying on a sofa (sadly, I think I just made a dirty joke, but I don't even get it...I've just heard it a million times...or seen it online). People don't have to be good people because it's just easier to not be, and it appears that it doesn't get you far in life... so why do it?

Basically, as a writer, or someone who hopes to make money on writing, everyone who produces television these days sucks. I hate them. Stop watching reality T.V. Go read a book. Go outside. Make out with your husband or wife. Do something more productive than watching a toothless redneck buy a truck made of duct tape.

Here, have a picture of...an invisible car!

JK, this guy polished his car so well it reflected perfectly. Pretty cool though, right? 

(hey, remind me to ask my boss for a water cooler so I can talk about my favorite tanned tubby toddler doing the tango on the latest episode of "terrible moms" or whatever that's called.) 

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